Learn the art of asking questions.

Questions are perhaps your greatest tool for pastoring people. On average, most people talk a lot more than they listen. Sometimes we feel this is justified because people need advice, or have even asked for it. Great - share some information, but unless you lead people on a journey of discovery it is unlikely to stick.

Revelation is what changes us, not information. And revelation is the full realisation of truth for ourselves. You can’t just attach to someone else’s revelation. It needs to come alive for you if it is to bring change.

So lead people with good questions. This helps them process their thinking and come to their own conclusions, guided by you.

But this is an art form and doesn’t come easily. It is not really natural and we’ve often had far more experience not doing this than doing it well.

Ask leading questions. Ask people what they think.

Here are some examples to get you started:

- what do you think about the way you responded in that situation?

- is that decision going to get you closer to where you want to be or not?

- what do you think God might be saying to you at the moment?

- what would you tell someone else who was facing the same situation?

- how have you dealt with situations like this in the past?

- what might be the right decision here, not just the convenient one?

Practice asking great questions! It makes you seem heaps more intelligent than just talking lots!

5 Comments | Add Your Comment

Melissa Hind 6 Jul, 2014

Thanks Nick! Great advice:)
Cheri Colbourn 7 Jul, 2014

Took a photo on my phone of the questions so that I have them to look at when necessary!
Chris Evans 7 Jul, 2014

Great advice thanks Ps Nick.
The more we listen the more we learn. If we ask for others opinion or suggestions, who knows we may learn something. :-)

Asking questions of the people we meet at church for the first time, and actually listening to them, will show them that you are interested in them.
This is the easiest way to start a conversation with someone that is new.

Asking the right questions only comes with practice, so lets get practicing!
Chris Evans 7 Jul, 2014

Sorry to hog but I just need to say that my favorite question up there is: "what would you tell someone else who was facing the same situation?"

That question has been used on me before and I have used it on others.

Quite often we know the solution to our problem, but are blinded by emotion or feelings.

Ask the person what they would advise someone else in the same situation and they will most likely provide their own solution.
Melissa Hind 8 Jul, 2014

You can hog anytime chris! Love your comments - such a great question to address a bunch of issues. I also ask it when someone is having a hard time accepting help or support. "what would you do if it was someone else going through this issue?" People feel a lot more comfortable accepting help when they feel like it is something they would do for someone else in that situation!